MY WIFE GAVE ME ONE HELL OF A FACIAL

Hey, this might be a big improvement for me!

My wife Ann was playing around in http://www.miniclip.com, a gaming site and found a new game where you can take pictures and give facials.

Here's the before:


Now the after:


OK - she went easy on me. Just picture what you could do with pictures of dissenters of the faith. Make them look as twisted as they really are! Just go to http://www.miniclip.com/games/putty-face/en/ and go to town with your favorite picture!

Peace,
BMP

NEW USCCB MUZAK DOCUMENT DEMOTED

...from law to a mere advisory, meaning that it doesn't need approval of the Vatican. I guess it wasn't all that great after all, and a certain outgoing BCL head knew the Vatican would reject it for its probable misinterpretations and contradictions from what Holy Mother Church really said.

One can only speculate, of course, those with destructive liberal agenda will try to pass said advisory as law.

Something "fishy" taking place? Thank God he's retiring and Bp. Serratelli takes over as BCL head!

WCRSCT to Jeffrey Tucker at NLM.

Peace,
BMP

CVTV and PYRO TV

Some great news for any CVTV fans out there:



is now available on



The channel link is http://www.pyro.tv/channels/17628/4. You can also simply click on the Pyro.tv logo above.

Peace,
BMP

JUST WHEN YOU THINK ST. JOAN'S IS BAD

Rochester Catholic can tell you some stories of what happened when he studied his way back to THIS side of the Tiber!
(WCRSCT to Gerald, who tipped the Curt Jester)
(snarky remarks mine, and in sans serif; the actual excerpts below in serif)

(Excerpts):
When I finally returned, it wasn't too long before I found out that I had entered a parallel universe of Catholicism as it exists in the Rochester diocese.

This parallel universe is the home of a permutation of the Catholic faith that is in some ways barely recognizable in the context of the historical and universal Church. This permutation has resulted in a dearth of vocations, the closing of churches, the closing of schools, and a dramatic decline in Mass attendance.

I thought it would be interesting to recount some of the things that I have experienced or been informed of in this parallel universe since I returned to the Church. I am sure that some of these events will resonate with you. As you read through them, it will be good to remember that these types of abuses will eventually die out. (I would say so - Bishop, I use that term loosely, Clark's been there 30 years; he's gotta retire sometime.) There is a restoration coming. This you can be sure of.

-The first parish that I experienced on my journey home had a preponderance of women with very short hair, dressed in albs, and pretending to be priests. They proclaimed the gospel, gave the homilies, and walked around with Moonie smiles. The last Mass that I participated in at this parish featured a woman homilist who serenaded us with the song "A Bridge Over Troubled Water". It was an appropriate farewell to the stormy seas of this parish that was attempting to prove that women have more testosterone than men. (OH GOD! The Poncho Ladies™ have invaded Rochester! Incidentally, I once had to endure a visiting priest bellow out the Theme from Mahogany - "Do you know where you're going to?" With that, I thought I was going to hell!)

-There was the seven year old girl who participated in the Consecration as part of her First Communion ceremony. (You mean there wasn't a whole class taking part, gathering around the table like one big happy family? Wipe that smile off your face, Spirit of Vatican II, it's sarcasm!)

-There were the liturgies at my daughters' high school in which the priest would stop the Mass and take a vote on which Eucharistic prayer to use. The group that yelled the loudest would win. At the end of Mass, the priest would walk around the room throwing candy to the crowd and high fiving everyone in sight. (Who inspired who? This or the infamous Barney blessing?)

-There was the "Insta Mass" at the University of Rochester at which students in torn blue jeans sat on stuffed couches around a coffee table and celebrated the Eucharist. (I'll admit when he first said "Insta Mass", I thought he meant in and out in 10 minutes.)

-There is the preponderance of homilies that instruct us that all religions are equal pathways to salvation.

-There is the preponderance of homilies that instruct us to love, love, love. That is unless the other person is an orthodox Catholic.

-There was the time that I was chastised by a priest for genuflecting before I received the Eucharist. He held up the Communion line while he scolded me in front of everyone within earshot. (Ah, someone from the Bishop, also used loosely, Tod Brown school of liturgy: GET UP! YOU'RE MAKING A SCENE!)

-Hearing that the only purpose of the Communion rail was to keep the barnyard animals out of the Sanctuary during the pre-Vatican II Church. (Apparently someone actually was stupid enough to give the faithful the impression that people once brought their goats to church! Naaaaaaaah! Billy, git back outside! What in tarnation?)

-Being continually informed that the killing of babies through abortion is of no more significance than a host of other social issues. Air pollution, poverty, universal health care, global warming, and welfare programs are all just as important.

-Having Catholic lay people and priests from outside our diocese constantly exclaim: "You're from Rochester? Oh, you poor thing! How have you ever managed to remain a Catholic?" (That's an easy answer - despite what he's been taught, he knows the truth and that said truth will make him free.)

There is plenty more (Rochester Catholic actually has two posts on this matter!) Now, St. Joan's is bad, yes. And no, it's not ok. But there are worse out there as well.

Peace,
BMP

ANOTHER USCCB POLL IN THE BLOGOSPHERE

An update to my earlier post

The American Papist has a REAL poll going for the USCCB (btw, thank you Thomas for the mention). No, I don't mean REAL, as in our votes actually choose which prelates are going to hold an office, but REAL, as in it's an interactive poll that actually gives you the up-to-the-minute results of who we as bloggers and blog readers would like to see (but won't necessarily will see) hold an office within the USCCB. BTW, not all the offices are represented here.

I, of course, cast my vote and here are the results after I voted:

Vice President (18 votes cast)
Dolan's in the lead with 44%. I picked Rigali, who is second at 28%. Four prelates, including the Fish, have 0%.

Committee on Clergy, Consecrated Life and Vocations (chairman, for a three-year term) (8 votes cast)
My pick, O'Malley, has ALL the votes right now.

Committee on Laity, Marriage, Family Life and Youth (chairman, for a three-year term) (4 votes cast)
My pick, Schwietz, and Vann are in a dead heat.

Committee on Ecumenical and Interreligious Affairs, chairman-elect (6 votes cast)
My pick, Gregory, has ALL the votes at this time.

Committee for the Protection of Children and Young People, chairman-elect (3 votes cast)
My pick, Cupich, has ALL the votes as I write this.

Committee on Canonical Affairs and Church Governance, chairman-elect (11 votes cast)
My hero, Burke, has 82% of the vote! WOOHOO!

The real vote by the bishops will take place when the meet in Baltimore this Monday.
Peace,
BMP

OUR BLOG'S READABILITY IS...

WCRSCT to Domini Sumus, whose blog scored "Genius" (way to go!). We're a bit mouthier, thus the "undergrad" level. But that's ok. That's what happen when "the guys" get a blog! (snark snark!)

Peace,
BMP

THE LATEST IN PONCHO LADY™ ORDINATIONS

is to be hosted by a female rabbi and will be performed in her synagogue. Here's the skinny from the National Catholic Distorter (WCRSCT to Gerald).
(snarky little rude interruptions mine)

Woman rabbi takes the heat for Catholic ordinations
By PAMELA SCHAEFFER, St. Louis

Two Catholic women are being (")ordained(" - quotation marks added by yours truly, since the folk at the Distorter are too stupid to add them themselves!) by Roman Catholic Womenpriests here Nov. 11, prompting outrage from Catholic officials -- outrage that, surprisingly, is directed less at the women aspiring to the Catholic priesthood (poncho lady™hood), or at the movement (")ordaining(") them, than toward a rabbi who agreed to host the event.

The women to be (")ordained(") are Elsie Hainz McGrath, a retired writer and editor for a Catholic publishing house, and Rose Marie Dunn Hudson, a former teacher. Bishop Patricia Fresen, who was for many years a Dominican nun, (")ordained(") the women as deacons Aug. 12 (Aw, crap! I missed it. I was actually doing better things that day, like celebrating my daughter's birthday) and will perform the ceremony (pig circus) here. The women are among a growing number of deacons, priests and bishops (")ordained(") in the Roman Catholic Womenpriests movement. Based on responses to formal invitations, Hudson said organizers are expecting 300 to 400 to attend.

Noting that ordaining women is forbidden by Catholic canon law (I refrained from adding quotes here, since this phrase is truth), St. Louis Archbishop Raymond Burke wrote to Rabbi Susan Talve, senior rabbi at Central Reform Congregation -- the synagogue host -- urging her to revoke her offer of hospitality (Abp. Burke is my hero! Seriously!). Meanwhile, the director of the archdiocesan Office of Ecumenical and Interreligious Affairs, Fr. Vincent A. Heier, has excoriated Talve for her role, likening it to a Catholic pastor inviting a Holocaust denier to speak, and describing Talve’s action as a major setback to the area’s strong, hard-won Jewish-Catholic relations.

The president of the St. Louis Rabbinical Association, Rabbi Mark Fasman finds it inappropriate for a synagogue to host an event no Catholic parish would allow and, though stressing that he speaks only for himself, acknowledged that among rabbis he is not alone. He is worried that what should be a Catholic issue -- whether women can be ordained -- will provoke a backlash against Jews. (At least Rabbi Fasman is making sense!)

Responding to Catholic concerns, the Jewish Community Relations Council released a statement Oct. 26 distancing itself and other Jewish congregations from Talve’s decision, stressing that Judaism is non-hierarchical and congregations are autonomous. “It is our hope that an isolated act on the part of a single congregation will not be allowed to disrupt the long tradition of continued dialogue and mutual respect between our Jewish and Roman Catholic communities,” the statement said.

The fracas is one that Ronald Modras, professor of theological studies at St. Louis University, finds both fascinating and profoundly symbolic. “It’s a remarkable demonstration of sisterhood,” he said. “You have women of two faiths, Catholic and Jewish, standing together against patriarchal exclusion.” He referred to Talve’s risking the ire of Catholic officials and rabbinical colleagues, both groups predominantly male, and the Catholic women’s bucking Catholic law.

Talve, founding rabbi of Central Reform Congregation, a former president of the St. Louis Rabbinical Association and herself active in interfaith affairs, is the most prominent female rabbi in St. Louis (enough so that her actions could give her bad name, even with Jews). Her urban congregation is noted for its inclusiveness and commitment to social justice (sounds like some of the nutcases I know in Catholic circuits). While Talve said she regrets the pain her action has caused to Catholic and other Jewish leaders, she is not backing down.

“These two lovely women who say they want to serve their community approached us. One of our core values is hospitality and providing a shelter of peace for those who are looking for a safe place. It seemed in keeping with these values, which come right from the Torah, to provide a space for them,” she said.

This isn’t the first time Heier, the archdiocesan official, has found Talve’s values misguided. “She has done a number of things in the past few years that I think are borderline in terms of sensitivity, pushing an agenda I don’t always agree with.” In this latest action, he said, “she has moved beyond the bounds.”

For Talve, the surprise is not such anger, but the number of positive responses she has received. Just as St. Louis Jews take differing stances on Talve’s decision -- she secured the unanimous vote of her board and the support of her congregation (that she herself apparently misguided) before agreeing to serve as host -- many Catholics have come forward to thank her for sharing her sacred space. “I have received dozens of letters, scores of e-mails and many phone calls from Catholics -- women religious especially -- who are in support of our hosting the ordination and understand the values that are guiding us,” she said. “It is painful and sad for me that there are people in the Catholic community who are offended by this.”

The Roman Catholic Womenpriests movement dates to 2002 when seven women were (")ordained(") priests by an Argentinian bishop. Since then, according to members of the movement, other male bishops “in full communion with the pope,” have (")ordained(") three women bishops, including Patricia Fresen, the former nun. By the end of this year, more than 40 women will have been ordained by the movement.

And more are in the pipeline. Roman Catholic Womenpriests presently has about 150 women in various stages of formation around the world, according to Gerry Rauch, vice president of the Women’s Ordination Conference board. “Every time there is a public (")ordination("), the numbers grow,” she said. (Yeah, but they're no longer Catholic.)

The movement’s leaders contend that the ordained women stand in the apostolic line descending from Jesus and his apostles -- a succession that the Catholic church regards as a hallmark of clerical authenticity. So their ordinations are valid (bull$&!+), they say, if illegal under church law.

Catholic officials don’t agree (me neither). Lawrence J. Welch, professor of systematic theology at Kenrick-Glennon Seminary and spokesman for the St. Louis archdiocese on the upcoming (")ordinations("), told NCR that as far as the archdiocese is concerned, “it isn’t a Catholic service, or ceremony or liturgy, because it is not in unity with the church.” As for the male bishops who performed some of the earlier (")ordinations("), “they were not acting in union with the pope,” so any claims to women in apostolic succession is wrong, he said.

In keeping with a form developed by Roman Catholic Womenpriests, both McGrath and Hudson have completed a course of pre-(")ordination(") studies and were previously (")ordained(") as deacons. Both women are converts and both have long been involved in service to the church. Each has four children and 11 grandchildren. (McGrath lost a 12th grandchild to a car accident three years ago.)

Hudson, a longtime teacher, was certified by the St. Louis archdiocese as a lay pastoral minister in 1998, after completing a two-year formation program, and received a master’s degree in pastoral studies in an extension program offered by Loyola University, New Orleans. She was the first woman to serve as parish council president at her former parish, St. Joseph Catholic Church in Farmington, Mo. (Gee, why "former", I wonder?!)

McGrath worked with the St. Louis archdiocese to develop a family life commission, earned an undergraduate degree in theology at St. Louis University while working as a secretary in the theology department in the 1980s. Invited to join the editorial staff at Liguori, the Catholic publishing house, she stayed for 12 years, while earning a master’s degree from Aquinas Institute of Theology in 2002. Her late husband was an (legitimately, most likely) ordained deacon in the St. Louis archdiocese, and she attended courses with him throughout a rigorous formation program. (He's probably rolling in his grave umpteen times over with his wife's current path of travel!)

Beginning Dec. 1, McGrath and Hudson will lead a faith community, celebrating Saturday evening liturgies at First Unitarian Church in St. Louis, across the street from Talve’s synagogue (because they don't DARE try to lead worship in any of them real Catholic churches). “I don’t know what kind of attendance we will have (none, if people are smart),” Hudson said, “but I know there are many people on the margins of the church (little does she know, she's one of them), and we think they will come. If they want to attend their own parish as well, they will still have that option on Sunday.” She added: “We are not calling our community a Catholic parish (THANK GOD!). We don’t want to be schismatic (sorry, too late!). But we will not hide the fact (wet dream) that we are Roman Catholic priests.”

Talve, while refraining from offering an opinion on what the Catholic church should do, wishes the women well. “I understand the call of women who want to serve in this way, and I believe women have something special to give. I have experienced this in my own life.”

Peace,
BMP

ORGAN HERO

The Curt Jester recently announced the release of the latest in organ education products - Organ Hero I for Praystation 3. If you've had your fill of Guitar Hero and you want a challenge, then Organ Hero is the toy for you. I love the fact that the game comes with a three-manual console (I've always felt two-manual consoles are too small, and four-manual consoles are too big), however, I don't know if I'd be able to fit my behind on that stool.

Pedalboard optional.
Peace,
BMP

WHAT'S THAT DAY CALLEDTHAT FALLS LATE IN DECEMBER?

Is it called "Holiday"? NO! It's "Christmas", with a capital "C". I'm not a big fan of this style of pop, even in a secular sect, but I AM a big fan of the message in this tune. WCRSCT to Domini Sumus.



Peace,
BMP

CATHOLIC CARNIVAL 144

...is up and runnin'! In fact, for the first time, the Catholic Carnival is hosted by our good friend Lyn F., the Organ-ic Chemist. For the first time in over a month, we actually sent in a story - the one about the English-speaking Church getting the short end of the stick when it comes to liturgy.

Enjoy!
Peace,
BMP