GAUDETE SUNDAY BULLETIN INSERT

In light of that moron that got elected Governor of Rhode Island last year despite only 35% of the vote and his "Holiday Tree" lighting at the State House on XII-6-11

This is the way of Governor (Grinch) Chafee and similar whack-jobs!

The Perennial Tree
This holiday tree can be left up ALL YEAR!

The New Years Tree - Hang empty champagne bottles on it with silly hats and toy horns
The George Washington Tree - Hang pictures of the first President on it (or chop it down and admit it)
The Martin Luther King Tree - Hang pictures of MiLK (editing mine) and have a recording of his wonderful I Have a Dream speech playing
The Valentine's Day Tree - Hang little hearts and candy
The Lincoln's Birthday Tree - Hang log cabins with beards on them
The St. Patrick's Day Tree - Have a corned beef and cabbage dinner and decorate the tree with shamrocks (iSNARK! side note: it's GREEN, just like a Christmas tree!)

The Labor Day Tree - Have employees come and occupy your living room
The Columbus Day Tree - Everyone go out and discover something you have never seen
The Halloween Tree - Hang pumpkins and masks from it and have children go beg it for candy
The Easter Tree - Hang colored hard-boiled eggs from it (but NOTHING with Jesus)
The Memorial Day Tree - Bring flowers, but DON'T pray
The Independence Day Tree - Parade around it and smoke lots of pot
The Thanksgiving Day Tree - Have a big turkey dinner there and hang pilgrims and Indians on it
The Christmas/Holiday Tree - Decorate with politically correct decorations, but no God talk or else!

Peace,
BMP