GAUDETE SUNDAY BULLETIN INSERT

In light of that moron that got elected Governor of Rhode Island last year despite only 35% of the vote and his "Holiday Tree" lighting at the State House on XII-6-11

This is the way of Governor (Grinch) Chafee and similar whack-jobs!

The Perennial Tree
This holiday tree can be left up ALL YEAR!

The New Years Tree - Hang empty champagne bottles on it with silly hats and toy horns
The George Washington Tree - Hang pictures of the first President on it (or chop it down and admit it)
The Martin Luther King Tree - Hang pictures of MiLK (editing mine) and have a recording of his wonderful I Have a Dream speech playing
The Valentine's Day Tree - Hang little hearts and candy
The Lincoln's Birthday Tree - Hang log cabins with beards on them
The St. Patrick's Day Tree - Have a corned beef and cabbage dinner and decorate the tree with shamrocks (iSNARK! side note: it's GREEN, just like a Christmas tree!)

The Labor Day Tree - Have employees come and occupy your living room
The Columbus Day Tree - Everyone go out and discover something you have never seen
The Halloween Tree - Hang pumpkins and masks from it and have children go beg it for candy
The Easter Tree - Hang colored hard-boiled eggs from it (but NOTHING with Jesus)
The Memorial Day Tree - Bring flowers, but DON'T pray
The Independence Day Tree - Parade around it and smoke lots of pot
The Thanksgiving Day Tree - Have a big turkey dinner there and hang pilgrims and Indians on it
The Christmas/Holiday Tree - Decorate with politically correct decorations, but no God talk or else!

Peace,
BMP

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AMERICA!

from yours truly, born on Canada Day! :)

Some great Peloquin work written during our nation's bicentennial year!
Enjoy!
Peace,
BMP

HAPPY HOLIDAY!

Yeah, Happy Veterans Day!
Peace,
BMP

PS: Thanx much, guys, for defending our freedom!

TODAY I GIVE OUT MY EASTER PRESENT EARLY

Yes, it's the April 2009 WTF AWARD!

This month, it goes to the faculty and staff of Brown University, who voted this week to change the name of Columbus Day to "Fall Weekend" on their calendars. They cited some crap about Columbus coming up north of the Caribbean and mistreating Indians. I don't ever remember reading anything like that in the history books, do you? Is this something a group of professors decided to invent recently? Or is this another attempt by Rhode Island's only Ivy League school (I use the word "school" loosely) to indoctrinate their students with their philosophical bull$&!+? (Ah yes, "philosophical bull$&!+", in lieu of an education, or better still, a very high-priced education!)

I'd give a WTF Award to the RI General Assembly, but I have a policy not to give the award to the same party(-ies) twice in a row. Oh screw it! I'll make an exception! During Holy Week, the legislative monkeys decided to put the following cards on the table: 1) the loophole in RI law that allows prostitution, as long as it's indoors and isn't the result of "human traficking", and 2) the ever-going gay marriage debate. In fact, one representative offered a bill that if the gay marriage debate does fail in favor of righteousness, that gay couples already married in other states can get divorced in RI.

Of course, this comes from a state where 60% of its population is Catholic. We Rhode Islanders shouldn't even be bothered with this kind of crap. But of course, the big argument is, Well, Iowa just okayed gay marriage, and our neighbors to the north and west (Massachusetts, home of Barney Frank, and Connecticut) are already doing it, and of course there's California. Who gives a rat's ass about these other states? I suppose if other states had legislators who jumped a bridge naked, some of our legislative monkeys would too! Don't these @$$&0!*$ ever consider actually LEADING instead of FOLLOWING? I find it hard to believe that many of these jerks were actually elected to their seats. (Of course, many seats in RI are often won with little or no opposition.)

Doesn't it seem funny that some of the most idiotic legislation happens during Holy Week? I'm beginning to wonder if many of our "lawmakers" are the Antichrist.

OK - so two WTF awards are given today. Congratulations, idiots!
Peace,
BMP

A NEW KIND OF BLEGGING

No, I'm not blegging for any kind of money or financial benefit. I'm actually putting out my plea to all musicians and parish priests in the United States: Please do NOT play Memorial Day music on Pentecost Sunday. Memorial Day is Monday. There is a special Mass that can be celebrated for Various Needs, if I'm not mistaken. You can go to town with patriotic music then. This Sunday is PENTECOST - the BIRTH of the Church (not to mention, our parish's Patron - Holy Ghost).

Last year I did have one person - I will not mention name or gender, leaving no clues - put up a stink to both the pastor and me. This person was begging me to play the Battle Hymn of the Republic. The pastor and I both explained to the person in question that Memorial Day is NOT what was being celebrated on the Sunday (last year it was the 7th Sunday of Easter - well, in this diocese anyways), and that a patriotic hymn would be inappropriate. Yes, I'm saying this, fully aware that my father (+1981) was in the U.S. Navy during the Korean War, and my father-in-law (+1999) was in the U.S. Army during that same war.

We stood our ground, "pastorally" - from the Latin word "pastor" meaning "shepherd". Instead of giving in, we teach.

Michael Lawrence of NLM has an excellent post on the topic at hand here. This Sunday, let's greet each other with Happy Pentecost in honor of the Birth of Catholicism.

Peace,
BMP