Saturday, May 24, 2008


Corpus Christi / May 25, 2008

I will forego mentioning the church I'm filling in at basically because you're going to need a strong stomach to read this list. I got a call from this parish's music director earlier in the week and got the music yesterday (he got my phone# from the diocese, since I put my name in for any substitute work and possible music director job leads).

The church in question had a pipe organ until recently. They downgraded to a Rodgers Insignia 577 (the exact same organ I played at the ghosthouse - however, at the ghosthouse, that same organ was an upgrade from a Kurzweil 250 synthesizer). They downgraded from Worship III and Gather I (they had both at one time, and I remember it being primarily Worship at one point) to Breaking Bread.

Get your upset stomach meds ready folks, because here goes:

Table of Plenty...Schutte
Gloria...Kreutz (OCP)
Praise the Lord, Jerusalem...Alstott (the best pick of the day)
Celtic Alleluia
Song of the Body of Christ...Haas
Massive Cremation (including the "Agnus")...Creation
- (NOTE: I put "Agnus" in quotes because "Jesus, Lamb of God" is NOT the Agnus Dei.)
Notre Dame Lord's Prayer...Werner
The Supper of the Lord...Rosania
I Am the Bread of Life...Toolan (tolerable)

Before you ask why I'm cow-towing to this crap - 1) I didn't pick ANY of it, and 2) I need the money. I'm covering three Masses - 5:00 tonight, and 8:30 and 10:45 tomorrow morning. That's $225 I wouldn't have had.

I'm debating whether or not to take my Protonix to church with me tonight and tomorrow.


Lyn F. said...

Yikes, Brian - they're totally underpaying you for this!

As for the MOC Agnus - Jason gave me a great idea some time back, and whenever I cantor and the MOC Agnus is programmed, I don't sing, "Jesus, Lamb of God" - I just simply elongate "Lamb" ... making it kind of melismatic. I will probably do the same this afternoon at the wedding I'm playing (and hopefully the frog in my throat won't be too distracting).

Brian Michael Page said...

Had it been just me, myself, and I, I'd likely do the same thing "Laaaaaaaamb of God...", and at the end, go "Graaaaant uuuus peace" instead of that "Grant us YOUR peace" crap. We had three singers upstairs tonight. Fine by me, since I clammed up and just played on the offertory (the Haas).


Adrienne said...

That's a some real cringe inducing music. But, what the hay, you got an extra $225.00 and it was better than a whole night in a bar playing Smoke Gets in Your Eyes:)

We've finally been driven out our parish by the music. We now attend a tiny little church (that is part of our parish), with an 80 year priest and no music at all. The people have no problem singing the Our Father and all the responses plus an entrance and exit song that Father picks (and he understands music. And, glory to God, they don't hold hands at the Our Father

When our Liturgical Committee (what a weird invention), got to the part about chant in the GIRM, the 10:30 music director sat their with his finger up his nose like he had never heard of such a thing. Probably hadn't! Idiot!

I Am the Bread of Life??? No I'm not.

Jason Pennington said...

That vanilla line-up needed the Dupre Ave Verum smack dab in the middle, and a bit of Messiaen thrown in for good measure.

I (and a couple others) hooted in laughter when a colleague of mine related he had played the Messiaen Banquet Celeste on Maundy Thursday. His priest/boss was the same idiot who thought the choir was singing wrong notes on the Dupre Ave because there was dissonance within the harmonic structure. The stupid priest pulled his organist aside and said "never play that again. It made my ears bleed." The group of us organists toasted to the idiot, then scratched our heads wondering who the hell had granted him his ordination, or whether he ordered it from Tony The Tiger, having snarfed down 12 boxes of frosted flakes and collected the box tops.


Brian Michael Page said...

Actually, he got it from watching one of those half-hour infomercials...


Joe of St. Thérèse said...

hahahaha, whenever someone suggests to me Massive Cremation, I just grab lightning and toss it at their heads. (Or alter it to fit the GIRM)