Thursday, July 31, 2008


Another song dedicated to that species of woman who continually subjects herself to excommunication, the Poncho Lady™. (Incidentally, I had to take the "™" off the word "Poncho Ladies" on the tag cloud. The new cloud doesn't support it for some reason.)

The Priestess Connection
Composed by Erin "Red Cardigan" Manning
(sung to the tune "Rainbow Connection", as performed by Kermit the Frog)

Why are there so many
Stoles made of rainbows
And vestments that are tie-dyed?

Rainbows are symbols
Of womyn's confusion
And yet represent gay-pride

Get on the boat and wrap sheets all around you
Mu-mus and trinkets and sea
Someday they'll find it, the Priestess Connection
Athena and Isis and me.

Who said that only men
Could stand at the altar?
(God did. But we just don't care)

Somebody told us that
And some may believe it
We say it just isn't fair

We've gone as far as we can with star-gazing
Tarot cards, crystals, and tea
We want to find it, the Priestess Connection
Demeter and Freya and me...

(...all of us can cast a spell
Though mostly we're just comi-tragic...)

Have you dozed off at lunch
And heard mystic voices?
Calls to the priesthood for dames,

Was it the voice of fate
Or maybe the pizza?
Where can we place the blame?

I think Dan Brown is the one who began it
Or people who think God is "She"
Someday we'll find it, that Priestess Connection,
Minerva and Lilith and me.......

la, excommunication...
la la la I cannot hear youuuuuu......!



Jason Pennington said...

I guess their reasoning is that if the Church freely ordains queens, why not women. Only problem, it's hard to hide the female pudenda in the closet, and you can't just "pretend" to use the men's room, whereas queens can just do what they gotta do in Houston then come back talking about all the groovy antique shops they visited....yeah...right!


Richard Chonak said...

Thanks, Brian. I'm ROTFLMAO. What could better represent the wacky childlike dream world of the priestitas and episcopettes better than the beloved Muppets?

Brian Michael Page said...

My daughter Brittany (who turns 11 a week from today) gets it...