2.26.2006

ASSIGNMENT CHRISTUS VINCIT - Results

A few days ago, I posted Assignment Christus Vincit. The assignment: Top Ten Least Popular Organ Stops. Here is the end result that is in the Christus Vincit Podcast (Podcast #18 - The Christus Vincit White List, Part 2). Comic lines added by yours truly.

Top 10 Least Popular Organ Stops:
10. Quintadena (also known as the Quintaton - meaning the stop weigns five tons)
9. Cornet (not to be confused with Coronet, Coronet Toilet Paper, or the Dodge Coronet 440)
8. Voix Humaine (aka the Vox Humana, or Human Voice - which is OK until that human voice sounds like the Fat Lady. After all, it ain't over till the Fat Lady sings)
7. Tremelo (not to be confused with "Tremble" or "Tremor" - do not use the tremelo if you are in California)
6. Conn Trumpet (the trumpet stop exclusive not only to Conn organs, but early Allen and Hammond instruments as well - it's loud, it's raunchy, is it even a trumpet?)
5. Copula (This is the stop that is so loud someone calls the cops)
4. Cromorne (truthfully, this is nothing that a good Oboe or Cornopean can't replace. Besides - the German version of this is Krummhorn - not to be confused with a kinda "krummy" sounding horn)
3. Schanrkdoppelposaune (this is a 32' pedal stop that sends left-wing cafeteria Catholics packing)
2. Banjo (This was on a Lowrey organ installed in the church I grew up with as a teenager, can you believe?)
AND THE NUMBER ONE LEAST POPULAR ORGAN STOP:
1. Anything activated by a drawbar with numbers from 1-8

Special thanks to our contributors:
Christus Vincit's own Jason and Nick, Lyn F. from the RPInet boards, our good friend Chris S., Charles from Land of Hope and Glory, and Matthew from The Dusty Choir Loft.

Peace,
BMP

3 comments:

Jason Pennington said...

I have found that the Schnarkdoppelposaune 32' is especially useful when improvising upon the intonation of the Gloria in Excelsis at the Solemn High Mass of Maundy Thursday. The wave lengths of that particular stop tend to cleanse the nave of any polyester nuns, stray liturgists, and NPM chieftans. On organs built for Lutheran churches, the stop is also known as the "Wittenburgerthesenanschlag-doppelposaune 32'"...

JP

Brian Michael Page said...

LMAO LMAO LMAO
Couple that with your favorite 8'4'2' combo along with a good "Schnarkenmixtur IV Rangs" and you're good to go!

BMP

Argent said...

You pipe heads!